This is a true story......

Mary Gray’s Chicken Soup

Mary Gray, shot her husband Stephen, for shooting their pet chicken. Before they hauled her off, she put her beloved pet in a brine, to await her return. To 2 gallons of water she added a cup of salt, a cup of Cajun Seasoning, a cup of apple cider, and threw in some rosemary from the garden she had been weeding. She then was hauled off to jail. When she returned, 2 days later, her beloved friend was ready and waiting for her. Mary thought to herself, “When life hands you dead chickens……..make soup!” So she did.

Rinse off the brined chicken really well. Cut the poor bastard in half, and put him in your soup pot. Cover him up with chicken stock, and bring him to a simmer. Turn the fire down to medium. Every now and then, pull the skin off, to keep the fat down. Cook it a good, long time, until it is falling apart. Put the chicken on a platter to cool. Open a bottle of wine, and as in Mary’s case, read a good book like “How To Be Divorced In 60 Days Or Less”.

Chop up some onions, a few carrots, a couple stalks of celery, some English peas,about a ¼ of a cabbage, and some small new potatoes. Dump it in the simmering soup. Take the chicken meat off of the bone, and add it to the pot. Next, mix a spoonful of cumin into a small can of tomato paste. Add it to the pot, and stir. Once the potatoes and carrots are soft, add about a cup of rice, and a shitload of salt and pepper. Hell, dig through your cabinet, and add some other spices, too. Whatever makes you feel creative. Simmer, for about 30 minutes. Make some garlic cheese biscuits to go with.

Now, Mary had another idea. In her garden, she had a bunch of cilantro growing. Determined not to let Stephen get a bit of it in the settlement , she went out and gathered up a bunch. She put it in the food processor, and added 2 jalapenos with the stems off, and the juice of 2 limes.
She then removed the pot from the heat, and stirred in this pesto. It was ready to serve!

*On a side note, Mary was found Not Guilty by reason of being married to an asshole.